If you use the Grey Rock Method with your abuser you’re probably gonna be accused of stonewalling.
Is there a difference? YES!
I can summarize the difference for you in a single word: MOTIVE.
Learn to recognize what is happening:
Pathological partners will stonewall you. They’ll walk out, ignore you, dismiss your feelings.
The motive behind all of those things is to manipulate you and break you down so that you make yourself smaller to accommodate their needs.
They demand that your reactions and emotions suit them. They’re doing that to exploit you.
Here’s what you do and why:
In contrast to that you are implementing grey rocking or the BIFF communication method (Brief, Informative, Firm, Friendly) to set a boundary. Boundaries are healthy. You’ve set that boundary in response to their manipulation and look: they’re still trying to manipulate you by telling you that your boundaries are equivalent to their abusing you. (It isn’t the same nor is it similar). When you’re in it, the abuse can feel endless.
Pathological partners are relentless.
Learn how to grey rock them or go no contact whenever possible in coaching sessions with me or in my Trauma Bond Recovery Course.
Happy healing.
